A few weeks ago I attended the 3 Day Abuse Class live streamed from Texas facilitated by Gary Douglas and Dain Heer. Originally, I wasn’t choosing this class as I have attended many Abuse Classes over the past 14 years since finding Access, so had concluded that I didn’t require another one.
Just as well I am cute, as I am sometimes not bright.
The day before the start of the class I started asking questions regarding the class and it was then that I knew that I just had to choose it. Wow I am so grateful that I did as the awareness and change that I have received from the class has been phenomenal.
I began to ask questions in regards to an event two weeks earlier and this is what opened the space to this new choice.
Two weeks earlier, my daughter had invited me to her MBA graduation from Bond University on the Gold Coast. Her husband and father were also in attendance. Her father and I have been divorced for almost 33 years and I concluded that spending the day with him would be easy. I am now so aware of how conclusions eliminate awareness.
The day arrived and as the day progressed I was getting more and more angry at the way that my ex was with me. Dismissive, lying, setting it up that my daughter and her husband would be against me, and constantly projecting.
I drove back to Brisbane in tears and asking: What’s right about this that I am not getting? What is right about me that I am not getting?
On the Abuse Class, Gary started talking about Gaslighters and who they chose to be. I had never heard of this expression before as most people would put their behaviours into the Narcissist basket. The lights started to come on for me and I had the awareness that my ex-husband is a Gaslighter.
During the class Gary highly recommended that we watch the movie Gaslight up to 20 times: a movie which was made in 1944 staring Ingrid Bergman.
I have watched it several times and now have the awareness of the energy that these people choose to function from.
Gary asked us: “What if you were the convenient target for the other person’s abuse? What if you didn’t take it personally?”
What if asking questions empower you to know that you know? What if questions open a space for a different possibility for you? Do you recognise some of the Gaslighter’s behaviours?
10. They try to align people against you. Gaslighters are master manipulators and find the people
they know will stand by them no matter what, and then they use these people against you. A gaslighter is a constant liar. When the gaslighter uses this tactic it makes you feel like you don't know who to trust or turn to, and that leads you right back to the gaslighter. And that's exactly what they want: Isolation gives them more control. This is one of the most effective tools of the gaslighter, because it's dismissive. The gaslighter knows if they question your sanity, people will not believe you when you tell them the gaslighter is abusive or out-of- control. It's a master technique.
The more you are aware of these techniques, the quicker you can identify them and avoid falling into the gaslighter's trap.
Article Written By Marg Braunack, Access Consciousness® Facilitator And 3-day Body Class Facilitator (with a class in Auckland in May).
Welcome to Access in Christchurch's blog! A collection of blogs from 3 authors, Margie & Rebecca Hulse and Sea Avery. Blog topics will range from consciousness, business, relationship, money, creativity, bodies, sex and more! What else is possible?